Travelling Solo
April 10th, 2007 | Published in general, travel | 20 Comments
Somebody responded to my tales and plans of travelling solo with an uncalled for “but the last girl I met who went to (insert third world country here) by herself, never came back! You should go with a man!” Sorry, I don’t need ââ¬â or want one ââ¬â for travelling, companionship, or other purposes. For any purpose.
Classmates mention exchange programs to Istanbul and they are inevitably met with “but Turkey is dangerous! Isn’t it in the Middle East?” protestations.
“Why are you going to India again?”
“You’re spending time in the hill tribe alone?”
If anyone knew the true nature of my summer plans, they’d know I’d never be alone. You are never alone in India. Ever. What is it with people, really? What are they afraid of? And why are people so afraid, and so annoyingly so? Why are people afraid on my behalf? I’m afraid of people. I’m afraid of being around annoying Singaporean people who will spoil my trip: so no hardcore travelling with friends, and certainly no groups. I don’t see a point in walking out of my house thinking a pot will fall on my head; so why should I be worried about unforeseen circumstances which are always gory, and related to death, abduction or rape?
Here’s a dare ââ¬â book a one way flight somewhere, bring no guidebook, and go by yourself. Just bring a strong dose of independence, confidence, street wisdom and common sense. I think you’ll find that’s all you need to survive anywhere. Showering in cold water if you have to; being on a train for 40 hours if you have to; eating by the street because you have to, and really, doing whatever the hell you want, because you can. The “it’s just you” thing doesn’t work; it’s not about backpacking, and it’s not about travelling. It’s about finding your feet and adapting.
Why India? Why not? It’s there, and it’s home to me. Why Pakistan? Why not? It’s there. Why Bangladesh? Because somebody paid me to go there and I actually had a good time. We could go on for ages. The point is, there’s plenty to see in the world if you’re a curious individual; I’m merely starting with the places that fascinate me the most, e.g. South Asia. Pick whatever country you want. It works the same way, and I can assure you travelling solo isn’t going to be too difficult. Gender can’t be a good excuse either. There is no reason why being female means you can’t do anything, I emphasize, anything at all, without a man in your life. India is now (to my mind at least) one of the easiest places to travel solo in. All it took was the guts to do it, and the ability to laugh at everything and talk to everyone. Maybe one day I will feel the same about China. Thailand solo is a walk in the park (if difficulty was a 10, Thailand would be a 0.5). I have never lost items, never been stolen from, never been robbed, very seldom ripped off, and hopefully things will continue to be so ââ¬â I think refusing to panic, lose your temper, or otherwise ‘lose it’, goes a long way. Maybe you’ll learn that the dodgy man fidgeting with your magazines and books in the Indian train isn’t going to steal it ââ¬â it’s simply a custom to share literature in 3AC and sleeper class; so don’t overreact, and give people a chance (though be smart about it).
The hundreds of people I meet on their one year/ two year/ three year/ forever round the world solo trips make me think I’m not the only one. Perhaps solitary travel only works for certain people, only these misanthropes like us enjoy being left to our devices for months; and the way things are shaping up these days, it’d better be working for me. It now puts food on my table and very possibly will continue to, so…
Now I miss India, my bharat ma.
Slightly incoherent, grumpy rant ends here. I’m feeling fragmented, incoherent, grumpy and sleepy all at the same time. With one exam down and more to go, before my beautiful snorkelling, 50 baht kahlua milkshakes and hot girls pack up this weekend in Ao Toh Ko, KPP.
April 10th, 2007 at 7:26 am (#)
Well said.
April 10th, 2007 at 8:24 am (#)
Kudos.
April 10th, 2007 at 10:00 am (#)
I love this entry because it’s exactly what I want to do. I like people well and good, but to make a trip on my schedule, being as relaxed/uncouth as I like (knowing it’ll never get back to someplace someone might actually know me), is just an amazing feeling.
That being said, as long as I’m on the parents’ stipend, that won’t happen (”India? Alone? A GIRL?! No Way!”). Heh. Hurrah for working girls!
April 10th, 2007 at 10:51 am (#)
AH MEN!
April 10th, 2007 at 11:58 am (#)
Ha! Those comments about Turkey make me laugh. As you know, I’m a single woman living in Turkey, and I can tell you firsthand that Istanbul is a hell of a lot safer than either New York or London. For one thing, people aren’t carrying guns in the streets.
I’m always tempted to give sarcastic replies: “but the United States is dangerous! Isn’t that where the have the terrorist attacks?”
I’ve lived all over North America and Europe before coming here, and Turkey is the safest place I’ve ever been.
April 10th, 2007 at 12:45 pm (#)
I just managed to get a taste of travelling alone for 3 weeks one and a half years ago.
And there is only one word to sum it up, “Amazing”, and it was absolutely not a lonely trip.
April 10th, 2007 at 3:47 pm (#)
Hey,
Came over here from Twitter sometime ago and have basically been lurking, somewhat fascinated by your adventures. Just wanted to say, though: great rant! Makes me wish I could travel more :-).
April 10th, 2007 at 7:53 pm (#)
you inspire me :)
April 10th, 2007 at 8:21 pm (#)
Smile and/but just do it! Doing it solo is actually a lot more enlightening but it is not something that ‘they’ will understand. Btw, regarding that ‘dare’ … been there, done that but it is not something for everyone, really.
April 11th, 2007 at 2:31 am (#)
i travelled alone too in europe (a lot) and i gather the same responses when i share it with my friends. that’s not gonna stop any future solo trips though and a solo trip is a total different experience with friends.. i met quite a number of solo females on the way too, so you are definitely not alone. cheers to solo lady travellers!
April 11th, 2007 at 3:59 pm (#)
Go for it. I love India. There is just so much about this ancient and diverse country to discover.
And it does not just stop at India. There are so many things in all corners of the world that we can learn about. We don’t know what we don’t know.
People who are contented just by spending their lives in their little greenhouse will never understand. Even if they travel, they move their little greenhouse with them and they remain in it, without ever sensing the world beyond its glass walls.
April 11th, 2007 at 5:36 pm (#)
I am also going to India soon. South though. Why? The answer is here: http://nalineebarrett.blogspot.com/2007/03/i-am-going-to-india.html
Any advice? I only know its going to be real hot in May.
April 11th, 2007 at 5:47 pm (#)
Hey! That’s cool! I’m going to the South as well. FINALLY. Congrats!
April 13th, 2007 at 12:04 pm (#)
Maybe we will bump into each other!
Yeah, right…lol
April 15th, 2007 at 2:02 am (#)
[...] Update: Just read something on traveling solo on one of my favorite blogs by Popagandhi. -Chinese student (ex, -maybe now) in Singapore, writer and traveler, also an Indophile… and keeps an excellent blog. You should check her out). [...]
April 16th, 2007 at 2:24 am (#)
I love this post. Something in me tells me that I should buy a one way ticket to somewhere too, but it’s been so long since I last did that. =(
April 16th, 2007 at 6:04 pm (#)
Middle East damn big leh. And Turkey is not even Middle East. I think it is considered Near East. This is exactly the kind of thing that make people think they will catch bird flu anywhere in Asia.
April 25th, 2007 at 3:47 am (#)
You’re right on - you are NEVER alone. I travelled for 6 months alone in Central and South America and of those 6 months I was only truly alone for a week - and that was because I chose to be. This summer I’m heading to Ethiopia for 3 months…solo!
Have fun this summer! :)
May 2nd, 2007 at 12:53 am (#)
Hey you go girl!
I tried backpacking in Europe alone and even in a comparatively ‘’safer” place — supposingly developed regions… there were comments.
” its so dangerous for a girl to be travelling alone?!”
” what if you get raped, murdered, beaten up?” as if only women get into trouble…
and the ultimate/universal comment
” its always better to have a man around”
the last comment always take the cake.
I totally agree with you man, those who never tried travelling alone dun realize that its one of the most fun things ever and defintely NOT lonely. (as they think)
Kudos to what you have been doing and you are giving me great insipiration.
All the way!
May 8th, 2007 at 2:04 am (#)
[...] 2. Popagandhi: For letting us travel vicariously on her many journeys to both far flung and near flung places. Places where you’d only travel vicariously because there’s probably not going to be hot water and electricity: Hereââ¬â¢s a dare ââ¬â book a one way flight somewhere, bring no guidebook, and go by yourself. Just bring a strong dose of independence, confidence, street wisdom and common sense. I think youââ¬â¢ll find thatââ¬â¢s all you need to survive anywhere. Showering in cold water if you have to; being on a train for 40 hours if you have to; eating by the street because you have to, and really, doing whatever the hell you want, because you can. The ââ¬Åitââ¬â¢s just youââ¬Â thing doesnââ¬â¢t work; itââ¬â¢s not about backpacking, and itââ¬â¢s not about travelling. Itââ¬â¢s about finding your feet and adapting. [...]