Rocket Boat
December 19th, 2006 | Published in dispatch | 16 Comments
Last week, I took a 100kmph rocket boat down the Mekong. I rode in that thing with a crash helmet and a life jacket for 6 hours, hugging my knees and all the while thinking we were going to crash.
It was a sampan with a fast engine and 6 crazy foreigners (myself included), and the scenery was beautiful. I couldn’t see much of the scenery, though: the boat was moving so fast I couldn’t open my eyes. My ear plugs flew out of my ear, and my hair styled itself quite naturally. The engine pounded mercilessly at (possibly) 130 decibels.
I was the only person who managed to fall asleep on that thing (I swear I’m not narcoleptic: he drone of the engines, however loud, was still monotonous).
I love Luang Prabang, but a short stint in Vang Vieng scared me shitless. It was Khao San Road with a river (which is my worst nightmare). So touristy that I might as well have gone to Phuket or Koh Samui (never over my dead body). Everybody sold the same mediocre and expensive food tailored for the Western palate. Everybody played the same music. You’d have 3 ‘bars’ in a row, on the little ‘island’ by the banks of the Nam Song, each of them with their sundecks and hammocks. Quaint, but it’s the same everywhere. I ran away in terror, and unfortunately ran out of Laos. I couldn’t even bring myself to stay long enough to go tubing. (It really was the food that got me: my tastebuds were protesting every US$2 plate of tasteless, unspicy, bland noodles.) After a quick overnight train ride from Nong Khai, I’m back in Bangkok, happily shopping at Pantip Plaza (the Thai Sim Lim Square), waiting for my motley crew of friends to assemble here in the city of angels over the next couple of days.
The rocket boat is, for me at least, one of those things you have to do before you get old and fat, and once you do, you wonder: what the hell was I thinking? I’d do it again in a heartbeat.






